Do not eat thy burritos, tis part of my soul
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look who’s finally joined!
look who got pushed to the side
(via emilianadarling)
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money doesnt buy happiness but i cant say id be upset in the least bit if i suddenly inherited 5 million dollars
(via carryonmywaywardidjit)
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when you see your parent come home from the grocery store
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What the hell…
lmfao jared didnt even flinch
TRUST
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theres a difference between shipping and being fucking insane
this applies to both tumblr and amazon.com
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“i want to wear shorts because it’s hot but i really hate my legs” an autobiography
“I want to wear shorts but i didnt shave” the sequel.
“I want to wear shorts but I don’t tan and I’d rather not blind you” The trilogy
“I want to wear shorts but my huge dick always sticks out” a pop-up book
a pop up book
pop up
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ladies. be careful when u wear spaghetti straps. it might distract the boys. they’ll start thinking of spaghetti. they will get hungry. they will stop at nothing to get their spaghetti.
(via beyoncethiest)
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In health class we were given sheets of paper and told to write a message we would want someone of the opposite sex to know
She read some examples
The girls were like: “Hey can you please not treat me like shit”
The boys were like: “Spray tans look ugly I hate when girls wear too much makeup and don’t lead me on.”
(via atala)
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story time
so about 7 months ago, my girlfriend at the time asked me to move in. so i did and we lived together for roughly 6 weeks. she asked me to move out until i was mature enough to live with a girl because in those 6 weeks i drew a dick on her face while she was sleeping 11 times.
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9 characters played by Misha Collins in Supernatural.
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- white dad in any movie: but son, you're throwing away your DREAM
- white son in any movie: no dad, I'm throwing away ~yours~
